Saccharine Thoughts

After watching yesterday's RT Pajamachievements and sulking about how much I dislike hearing my own voice (it's a personal source of annoyance) I embraced Sarah Von's idea here of assembling a "marching band of our own horns" to toot in unison. Per her suggestion, I will be balancing out all that self-voice-loathing I did yesterday. Yes and Yes is a source of encouragement, inspiration, or in the least a good giggle for me almost every day, so here goes: 5 physical things that I adore about myself, and you should too! My eyes - blueish/greenish/grayish with an occasional hint of amber, they are extremely expressive and change according to my mood. My smile - While I have been told it's mature, genuine and encouraging, who knows how much of that is fluff and flattery? What I do know is that it comes completely natural to me to smile approximately 87.5% of the time. My nipples - yes, weird and probably TMI for anyone reading, but I am incredibly thankful that ...

Here goes, you get to see a side of me I hate to admit exists. I have been sunk deep into a rotten mood for days, thus the lack of entries. Feeling less like myself everyday, it is so hard to dig oneself out of that without someone there to lend a hand, but I have to, HAVE TO, pull myself out of this on my own. I can’t count on others to make me feel like me again, no matter how badly I want to curl up on my end of that bright red couch with someone next to me. While I know that would give me the sense of comfort, hope and utter happiness that I’ve been craving, it is not what I need, because there won’t always be someone there to warm the couch cushions with me. Bored, lonely, badly lacking energy. Really sore, frustrated, tired of hauling 12 pounds of steel around on my leg, tired of strangers trying to hide their stares and failing miserably. Scared shitless of a possible infection in the large incision that’s still healing, and that my surgery may fail again with no real cause desp...