Saccharine Thoughts

Patience and Faith are not interchangeable. One of them eventually runs out.

I recently had a discussion with a friend regarding faith - religious and otherwise. This topic was specifically inspired by her noting how much I invest in other people, while being unable to devote myself to a religious view. She asked some seriously great questions for me to ponder and eventually answer. This was a killer opportunity to learn from her ideas as she is strongly of the Christian faith, while establishing and organizing my own thoughts and beliefs. Thus I feel it appropriate to share, per her permission, with you. "People are self-centered by nature," she explained. "I don't put any faith in them. Being hopeful that they will respond to my love in kind is important, but it's about having the right expectations so that I'm not caught off guard by disappointment." This is something I intensely disagree with. While she loves and feels the need to help people, my friend finds all strength, recognition, comfort and encouragement that she needs...

I had the pleasure of watching Once this afternoon with Jack, and loved it. Not for its complexity or cinematography, but for its honesty and simplicity. Last year Once was nominated for 2 Grammys and won an Academy Award for Best Achievement in Music. Made on a tiny budget with "singers who could half-act" (per the director in the features at the end of the disc), it was roughhewn but well done in that, everyday and not at all storybook. Enjoy.

Wouldn't it be grand if we could heal all the people we love? Comfort them with foresight and a guarantee of what's to come. Make them forget how they had been hurt before, forget how their hearts had been broken, forget the moment they learned to no longer trust. Stitch up where others had gone wrong and make them believe that it won't happen again. What does it take to slough off the callouses from such old scars? Scarring is the body's emergency freakout reaction to a wound - the result of an overabundance of white blood cells that lay a new bed of fibers to heal. It creates a thick, protective barrier that while effective in its use as replacement for damaged tissue, is far inferior to its predecessor. Scars do not grow, do not feel, barely live - they rather just kind of exists. Some scars run too deep to soften; instead the scar tissue binds itself to the muscle underneath, hindering its ability to function at all. I have come to think that learning to love, trust...

Sergei Lukyanenko I finally finished Nightwatch , and am finally getting around to telling you about it... My initial response was that the 2004 film, which I was a huge fan of, is SO very different from the novel. I still think both are very commendable works - not something I normally, or ever, say when a film based on a book takes so many liberties. Nightwatch is set in contemporary Moscow and chronicles the division between Light and Dark. All chief characters of the novel are "Others" - the chosen beings who possess the gift of seeing past this life and realm of being into the next: the Twilight, and who act as the soldiers in the eternal war between Good and Evil. Nightwatch takes on a sci-fi fantasy feeling as you learn that the Others take the form of shapeshifters, vampires, sorcerers - all kinds of fantastic and demonic beings. They patrol Moscow as parts of the Daywatch, made up of Dark Others, and Nightwatch, the organization of Light Others. Being set in mode...

Hope is something innate in the human psyche, something imbedded in the brain that allows us to see a spark of sunlight on a dreary day. For me it is something that doesn’t just keep me afloat through the maelstroms of life, but that gives me reasons to smile everyday. However childish or whimsical this is it is how I have been wired; hope is my fuel. As I age I notice that thoughts, feelings, changes and decisions become more important and thus a little more frightening, yet my faith in the positive seems to hold strong. I have to ask myself now though, is there a point when the naiveté of hope becomes a hindrance? The Greeks personified Hope as Elpis – a childlike being housed with all the evils of the world in Pandora’s box. Elpis was the only item to remain captive when the other evils were released, and was said to have been set free when mankind could not manage the other evils without it. This begs the question: what on earth was hope – humanity’s antidote to despair...

After watching yesterday's RT Pajamachievements and sulking about how much I dislike hearing my own voice (it's a personal source of annoyance) I embraced Sarah Von's idea here of assembling a "marching band of our own horns" to toot in unison. Per her suggestion, I will be balancing out all that self-voice-loathing I did yesterday. Yes and Yes is a source of encouragement, inspiration, or in the least a good giggle for me almost every day, so here goes: 5 physical things that I adore about myself, and you should too! My eyes - blueish/greenish/grayish with an occasional hint of amber, they are extremely expressive and change according to my mood. My smile - While I have been told it's mature, genuine and encouraging, who knows how much of that is fluff and flattery? What I do know is that it comes completely natural to me to smile approximately 87.5% of the time. My nipples - yes, weird and probably TMI for anyone reading, but I am incredibly thankful that ...

A result of mine and my sister's brilliant albeit slighly geeky brains, this is our cousin and her best friend in super heroine form.

Today marks 1 month since my surgery. I am released from wearing my brace. Wait, let's hear that again... I am released from wearing my brace! Yeah. Kickass. I'm back to spending a couple of hours in the gym every other day and instead of lifting like crazy, I have found serious success in working out like a girl. Imagine that. Light weight, lots of reps, lots of isolation and ergometric exercises and biking like crazy. My hips and love handles have noticeably shrunk, my tummy is flattening out and I have officially lost 7 pounds since the day of my surgery, bringing me to 5'2", 131lbs. I am on a roll... and if I can keep it rolling, I want to be down to 126 by May 1. I feel like that is a completely realistic goal, not something that will require major changes or overexertion on my part. I know if I continue to take care of myself, keep focusing on the rehabilitation of my knee and all involved, my body will continue to respond the way it has been so far. It i...

Not such a big deal for anyone else, but for me this is kind of a milestone. My first newsletter was sent out to our entire customer base today!

Things I want to do in the month of April: Make cookies and brownies for people who helped me out last month, while I was all laid-up with the post-surgery gimps. Take, upload and edit Jon's headshots Continue going to the gym Make Rice Krispie Easter eggs Hostess a dinner Make tilapia tacos for Chloe again Finish my tattoo design Get glass cut and painted for my desktop Paint the blank canvas hanging over my bookcase Pretty-up my kitchen. It's blah, and I need to put the shelf liners in and reorganize everything. Finish 3 logo designs for Megan Finish reading Nightwatch and Ultimate Gift, read From Russia With Love Practice drawing caricatures Go to the Farmer's Market Plant jasmine on my patio Smile. A lot. Ready, set, go!